A Cardinal Experience: How to Build a Nest

Today as I went to my car, which is red, I saw a female cardinal fly by and sit on top of the side mirror of a red SUV in the parking lot.  I've seen her before near my car.  She sits on top of the light post next to where I park.  It is difficult to see in this picture because of the distance, but she is sitting on top of the mirror of the SUV.  She kept flying down in front of the mirror and pecking at the glass, then she'd fly near my car and back to the mirror.  Maybe she liked the color of the red cars?  I guess even wild birds must love mirrors!  I was almost in a trance watching her, but I wasn't able to catch the picture with her in front of the mirror before she disappeared.

I sometimes wonder about the strange behavior of birds or animals, and if there is a message or meaning.  I found out that male cardinals can change their color to look like the female cardinal while the female is nesting on her eggs.  He does this to help her fill her role by gathering food for her until the eggs are hatched and the baby birds can leave the nest.  His color changes to make him less visible to predators so he can provide for his family.  So the cardinal I saw could have been a male or a female bird!

I also found this article while looking up more information about the behavior of birds:

Birds attack shiny surfaces because they see their own reflections. In the case of a window, the bird does not see through the glass: it sees a reflection of the outside, possibly trees and the sky, and another bird of its own species. The real bird does not recognize itself and mistakes the reflected bird for a competitor for territory or mates. It attacks the image in the window, trying to drive the other bird away.

Of course, this is a fruitless exercise. The bird reflection will always be there, forever inaccessible behind an invisible barrier. The real bird often returns many times, compulsively launching itself at the window. If it is very aggressive, it could damage its beak, but most often it just wastes energy and time. Very large birds may break the glass, to the distress of bird and home occupants alike.

Then I found another website with information about cardinals:

The recognition of a genuine symbolic sign can lead to the beginning of a new communication with something that is beyond our normal realm of experience. In this respect, a symbolic sign can be considered a phenomenon or, a Cardinal Experience.

Because symbolic signs are so uniquely individual, appearing in all shapes and sizes, they may not always be easily recognized as symbolic signs, or immediately understood. Symbolic signs may be presented to us in an unending array of forms: birds, animals, people, places, things or events. Whatever shape or form your symbolic sign may come in, keep in mind that the form is the messenger and the messenger is an important clue to the message.

Perhaps that is why a cardinal messenger is so often chosen to deliver such deeply significant messages to us. With his bright red color and powerful call, the cardinal tends to stand out from the crowd. There are times when it may be possible for a little red cardinal to get our attention when nothing else can, especially in times of depression and grief.

The more we learn about the messenger, the more clues we may gain about the message. While each message is special and unique to the individual, the cardinal messenger has some unique qualities of his own. Relating these cardinal qualities to your particular life situation may help you to understand more about your uniquely individual message.

Cardinal Color: One of the first and most obvious qualities about the cardinal is his color. Cardinal red is so called because it is one of the three primary colors. The primary colors are red, blue and yellow. All other colors are a combination of these three basic colors. That the visual spectrum begins with red hints at the importance of the cardinal, beginning with his powerful visual presence.

The Cardinal Cross: While we are all familiar with the symbol of the cross as it relates to the death and resurrection of Christ, the concept of the cross from the root of the word cardinal may open some new thoughts on the subject.  The oldest base root of the word cardinal is actually connected to the word cross.  The word cross comes from the Old Norse word, kross and the Latin word, crux. For the ancient Romans, the Latin word crux had comet to mean "a guidepost that gives directions at a place where one road has been split into two."  It's not hard to recognize the figure of Christ as the 'guidepost' who offers directions to travelers along the road of life.  Where one road has been split into two, can easily be seen as the crossroad we all come to at some pivotal point in our lives.  It is the place where we must make an important, cardinal choice and need guidance to do so.

On a deeper level, one road that has been split into two can also refer to our perceived separation from God.  If we are walking down a road and it splits into two, we have a choice to turn right or left.  If it is truly a cardinal crossroad, we may experience finding our guidepost at the intersection.  We may discover that there is only one road that leads to faith and unity.  Whatever we find there, we can be certain that finding ourselves at a crossroad is a cardinal opportunity to 'find our way' at the 'cross.'  The root word for cross is contained in many words we commonly use:  across, crucial, crucify, cruise (to cross the sea, or go backwards and forwards), cruiser, crusade, crux, and excruciate.  In the cardinal sense, the cross represents fourfold systems:  the four directions: north, south, east, and west; the four seasons; the four elements; the four winds; the four gospels; the four chambers of the heart; etc.

How to build a nest:

No Pink Ribbon, Just a Purple Patch -to KILL CANCER!!!

Today started out something like a purple patch day, "It was a dark and dreary morning, ..."  It really was dark and dreary out, it was rainy and chilly!  Strange weather for the middle of July in Oklahoma.

I was also dreading this day - as usual - when I have to go see my oncologist.  All the mental gymnastics are worse than the actual visit.  What will they want to do this time?  What are the results going to be?  etc., like walking through a mine field, but I tell myself it never goes the way I think and to put away the fears and use my energy to be positive and to get militant.

It's an exercise in walking the fine line between "save me?!" and "leave me alone already!"  I try to stay in the middle and save myself.  I say "I'm fine, I'm doing really great!"  Which is mostly true.  I'm so low maintenance as a patient it seems sometimes like they want to push me to do things, not because it is necessary, but because it justifies that they are doing something new to write on their paper and they feel uncomfortable if they aren't doing something more.  So far my protocol is I take one pill a day, Tamoxifen - so I haven't had to make changes, just monitor things every month.  So far, no pain, no problems.

After my blood test, the doctor went over my history and then did my exam (this exam is after a mammogram and ultrasound results in May indicating that I need to have a biopsy on my left breast).   The last time he did my exam he measured a mass of 3 cm.  The ultrasound results said it was larger than before.

This time after the exam was complete, the nurse left the room.  The doctor sat down at the computer to update the records, and then he stopped.  He had a perplexed look and said, "Huh!!"  I thought, "that doesn't sound good, I was hoping I could get out of here without any catches."  I just wanted to be let off the hook.  Leave everything the same, I feel fine.

He said, "let me go and get the nurse, I need to check something."  I thought to myself, "Oh no, let me go - just leave me alone and let me go already... I don't want to have any more biopsies, surgery, medicines, etc."  Then I thought, "I am being way too anxious.  They are only trying to help."  So I took some deep breaths and waited.

The doctor and the nurse came back in and repeated the exam and then he sat back down at the computer.  He said, after a pause, "I just wanted to be sure I was right.  Did you know that you had a mass on your breast of at least 3 cm (he whipped his measuring tool out from his coat pocket and held it up to demonstrate the size of a 3 cm mass)...

          I said, yes, I remember.

He said, well, it's not there anymore!

          I said, it's not?  I thought the mammogram and ultrasound results said it was larger than before?

He said, "well, its not there now.  There is regular tissue, but nothing irregular or solid like a mass that was there before!"

He about fell out of his chair when he was telling me, then I about fell off of the table.  I was not expecting to hear that!  I said, "Wow, I guess my medicine must be working!  See?  You're doing the right thing."

He said, "it looks like something happened.  When good happens, we don't question it!"

I didn't tell the doc that I have been taking baking soda and molasses to bring my pHd-own, or is that up, to 8.0-8.5 alkaline for a few days, which has been known to KILL CANCER!!!!  It looks like something is working!  A purple patch of victory in this case!!

I'm also thinking of a purple patch to remember my grandfather in Germany who, although he was not a Jehovah's Witness like the victims who wore this patch during the Holocaust, he was killed by Nazi SS Officers for refusing to follow protocol or show honor to Hitler (my equivalent of cancer).

My grandmother also rode her bike in winter to surrounding villages to collect food, clothing, and supplies to protect and provide for the Jewish prisoners that were being held in the factory where he was a supervisor before he was killed.  My grandmother was from Warsaw, Poland. We don't know if she was German, Polish, or Jewish, but I was told she kept the Sabbath and was raised by a Jewish family in Warsaw that she "worked for" as a child.

My grandparents hated Hitler and would have nothing to do with his regime.  When my mother was a child and came home with some flyers that she found that had been dropped as propaganda by the Nazis, my grandmother tore it from her hands and put it in the fire.  She wouldn't allow photos of Hitler or any of his influence in their home.

At one point, several SS Officers came and set up a headquarters in part of their home (which was a large summer resort in the mountains).  The arrangement was forced on my mother's family, but my grandmother set down rules for them.  She told them NO bringing women into her home, and if she caught any of the married men cheating on their wives she was going to call their wives and turn them in.  Eventually they were the ones who killed my grandfather, and their home was fire bombed to the ground by Axis Powers that may have learned their civilian home was being used as a headquarters.  All the SS Officers went into hiding, my mother was separated from her mother and didn't know where her family was until many years later.