The first and only time I have seen a total lunar eclipse before today was a few years ago from a beach house balcony at Balboa Island in Newport Beach, California. Last night I saw the total eclipse of the moon for the second time just above my front door! I only had to step outside to be under its shadow. The phases of the eclipse last for around five hours. The first time I saw one, I was sick with the flu, so I didn't stay outside long enough to watch it completely.
This time, I spent time watching the various phases as diagrammed in the photo above. One thing I noticed this time was that during the phase when it is leaving the umbra back to penumbra, there was a large area of blue light reflecting back up onto the moon, while the moon was still mostly red. The appearance was as if the moon and a reflection of the earth were in an embrace. The reflected blue light is due to the atmospheric changes, but it was a dramatic effect! The colors were so vivid and seemed to dance, even to the naked eye. At first, I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me for being up all night, but my daughter also confirmed that it was definitely a blue reflection which looked like two orbs instead of only one.
I am always reminded of a bride in her wedding gown when I see the full moon, and seeing the moon going red was as if it were going through a bloody battle, emerging as a triumphant warrior-bride, crossing over the dark phase to get to her bridegroom. When I read the story about Adam and Eve, that Eve was taken out of Adam's rib, or side, I am also reminded of the theory that the moon was formed out of the earth and broke off from it when the earth was struck by a huge planetesimal, at least that is the theory accepted by most astronomers for the origin of our moon, although the metaphors are from stories I've heard of various origins.
The mall was pretty dead last Friday night. We're waiting for Ariele's friend to arrive from Ft. Sill in Lawton, OK. It is her first time to meet Robert in person, who is in the Army and just recently returned from South Korea. While waiting we decided to visit the Waldon Bookstore. Besides being sick with the flu all week (please excuse in advance my cough and all), I wanted to be there for the occasion. Here is a rare moment of Cooper being still long enough to read us a story:
He made it through the book and nearly broke out in his metal voice a couple of times near the end... not easy for him to keep from it even while reading "Corduroy."
Feeling better now thanks to lots of green tea, back to homework and the laundry...
This week, in addition to doing naked eye observations in Astrology, we had to dissect a baby pig in biology lab. We had no volunteers at our table of four who were willing to do the dissecting, something I vaguely remember with a frog in a high school class before. Ours was a small baby female pig. I decided to begin so we could get it over with by thinking of it like cutting up a chicken to get past the initial grim thought of cutting through the skin. Then I named the pig "Pearl" and thought about Ichabod Crane in the movie "Sleepy Hollow," the coroner who fainted easily, and rolled up my sleeves. Once I got started, I became more interested by the details of the different organs. By the time we were finished, I was ready to look at the brain, one of the most interesting organs to me, but we found out we couldn't include anything above the neck. I can see why Dr. Frankenstein became so obsessed, there is something fascinating about understanding how things work that makes it hard to know when you've gone to far. (Never give me a scalpel unless you really want me to use it.) I had a small following before it was over who were also interested in looking at the brain. I'd say it went well, with a stretch of the imagination, except for the missing blood, white lab coats, the electricity, the storm and the castle - I shouldn't have read Mary Shelley's "Frankentein" the semester before I took biology, things tend to overlap a bit and I like to relate all things to art and literature. This kind of procedure could even be considered a work of art by the cut-ups, although the use of preservatives made me wonder what the universe could be saying to me in the "now". The song playing in my head through the procedure was ohGr's song "Cracker" and Death in June's "All Pigs Must Die," but I'm not sure what that means except that I don't think it means literally that all the pigs must die. And not to ruin a good piggy song, but I am sorry that this one had to die.
A few weeks ago I had a similar but alternate experience when I went to the Asian market with two friends, Cooper and Ben from the band Warped Corpses. Ben wanted to cook dinner for us all and he sometimes makes his own sushi. This time he wanted to try a frozen octopus. I was already sick that evening, so I rested on the couch while they were doing all the preparation for the dinner. It turned out that they had to clean it before cooking and the size of the octopus was similar to the little pig except they also had to remove its eight long tentacles. I wondered if they were enjoying themselves much more than they should have for such a gory task. I don't think I heard them laughing and "cutting up" so much before and I realized that they were more interested in exploring the dinner than actually cooking or eating it. I was tempted to look in on them but I didn't want to spoil the magic, and unless like Tom Green on "Freddie Got Fingered," I might find one of them wearing the octopus on his head. They weren't being obscene or disrespectful of its being, but just having some good clean-ing fun, and although the laboratory and scientific observations were missing, the wonder of exploring life and playing like children seemed more connected to the nature of life as a scientific naked eye observation. But then, maybe I have gotten used to their peculiar sense of humor. I didn't get to eat the dinner since I was sick, but it turned out to be a really nice meal when it was all done.
A quote from an article from a previous project I did about William Burroughs and cut-ups:
In reading "hermann nitsch' orgien mysterien theater- the artist as high priest," an online article, I recognize a correlation between the artist as painter and the cut-up method of writing in the following paragraph:
"When paint turns into intestines and painting into slaughtering, also the painter must be drawn into such vortex. Whereas formerly he used to disappear in the canvas, he now places himself in the forefront as an actor staging the act of painting. The canvas is literally turned into a mere backdrop. Already action painting introduced ‘das Schaumalen’ - ‘painting as a performance’, as Nitsch has it (p. 49). In the footsteps of Pollock he begins to ‘paint and splash huge planes, jumping around on the canvas and to let himself go’ (p. 61). The trend is accomplished when the product is wholly replaced by the process: from painting to ‘Aktion’ – the German word for 'happening.'"
The dissection wasn't what most would consider high art, but we all knew it needed to happen. I also remembered that I have been and hopefully not again at the other end of the scalpel.
Historically, the zenith of naked-eye astronomy was the work of Tycho Brahe (1546–1601), who built an extensive observatory to make precise measurements of the heavens without any instruments for magnification.
Under typical dark sky conditions with a minimum of light pollution, the naked eye can see stars with an apparent magnitude of up to 6 on the apparent magnitude scale.
The scale now used to indicate magnitude originates in the Hellenistic practice of dividing stars visible to the naked eye into six magnitudes. The brightest stars were said to be of first magnitude (m = 1), while the faintest were of sixth magnitude (m = 6), the limit of human visual perception, the naked eye (without the aid of a telescope). Each grade of magnitude was considered twice the brightness of the following grade (a logarithmic scale). This somewhat crude method of indicating the brightness of stars was popularized by Ptolemy in his Almagest, and is generally believed to originate with Hipparchus. This original system did not measure the magnitude of the Sun. The scale works in retrospect, rather the brighter the star, the smaller the grade of magnitude, where the sun would be an apparent magnitude of -26, and as we know, the naked eye would be damaged by direct observation of the sun's brilliance.
Some of the faint light of distant stars and planets which would be perceived with color are not perceived by the naked eye with color due to the detection of weak optical signals by the neurons within the human visual system which are detected by optic nerve rods rather than cones.
There is also a consideration of dark stars, how they are detected and how to determine which is the darkest star. I'll write about that another time. But so far, since the observation cannot be made with the naked eye, and a dark star is a dark matter, here is one candidate for The Darkest Star:
One more:
Sources: Astronomy course material/UCO, and info from http://en.wikipedia.org /wiki/Apparent_magnitude and Youtube.com
Ariele-Carlos Well, as expected, the day did include a crime scene with yellow tape, just not at a party in the way I had imagined it (in a previous blog)...
I had the day off and at 11am it was time to pick up my daughter from the bus station. She was returning from Dallas where she went the day before to see a killer concert. I was so glad to know she made it on the bus home safely because she was determined to go alone to Dallas this time, and also no one to meet her when she arrived there and she also planned to attend the concert alone. She was hoping to have a chance to see the person she wanted to talk to while she was in Dallas but it never worked out. She left at 4:30 am to take the bus there, after a six hour bus ride wait all day downtown for the concert to begin after only a couple of hours of sleep, then make it back to the bus station after the concert ended at around 1:00am and get on the next bus home which didn't leave Dallas until 6:30 am. Her cell phone died before she made it back, but she finally made it safely back onto the bus.
I arrived downtown near the Union bus station 40 minutes early. The street from the Greyhound station going west two miles is one of the most dangerous areas of town. Many of the homeless men who are addicts and alcoholics congregate there, drink and sometimes fights break out. This morning there was already a crime scene van, several police cars, the coroner's maroon car and all the usual yellow tape. Just then I got a call on my cell phone from an unknown number. It was my daughter, "Mom, where are you?" I said, "I'm just getting to the bus station, where are you?" She said she was at a corner down the street from the bus station where she had walked to find a phone. It turned out to be the same corner as the crime scene. I said, "What?! Are you okay? did you know there has been a murder there?" She said no, she didn't see any ambulance. I said, "Didn't you see the crime scene van and the coroner's car?" She said, "No, I just saw some policemen with clip boards and I asked them where I could go to use a phone." I said, "Okay, stay there, I'm at the next corner and I'll be there as soon as I turn around. I just passed the corner where you are." She said, "I'll just walk and meet you down at the McDonald's, it'll be easier." (The street from the corner where she was all the way going toward McDonald's is truly one of the worst streets in town and she wanted to walk through just after a murder.) I said, "DO NOT leave that shop until I get there please... I'm right outside." She didn't understand why it was dangerous and yet she just spent a whole day and night alone in Dallas in the same kind of area of town and her cell phone died before she made it back... I think I'll have that birthday drink now.
Ariele was hungry and although tired she wanted to go with me to our favorite restaurant, Tokyo's, and we had a beautiful and triumphant lunch where she told me all about her adventures and the concert in Dallas. I had their famous box lunch with some chilled Pearl Silver sake in a small glass that fits into a masu, which is a little wooden box. They pour the sake to overflow the glass into the box and when the cup is empty, the extra sake is poured from the box into the cup to end it. It is symbolic for good fortune to overflow in your life to have sake in this traditional way, which I didn't know until they told me later. The lunch was beautiful as I sat basking with the warm sun coming in over my shoulder and the presentation of the meal in an artful display which is always half the fun, and of course I enjoyed the company of my daughter too, even though we were both saying "Oh Crap! you/I just wandered through a crime scene!"
Kids are so precious, with usually good intentions and are so innocent to danger, sometimes oblivious. Life can be so beautiful in its innocence and yet sometimes so ugly and frightening too, some make it through and others are not so fortunate. The person who was killed was once someone's child. I felt fortunate that my daughter made it home safely. She is eighteen and she is determined to do things her own way, which can be good and also frightening for a parent. I have determined to believe for the sake of my sanity that the 40 year old "crack addict" lady who lives under the bridge in Dallas, who befriended her on her way back from the concert to the bus station while she was there was really an angel with a few bruises. Ariele bought the lady breakfast at the bus station in Dallas before coming home, she kept saying that Ariele must be an angel, which made my day.
Ariele was too tired to wait for me to finish my sake, and since I had to drive I didn't get to "end it" in the traditional fashion, but that leaves some extra to share a toast with you to good fortune and the future.
One of my questions at lunch: So, how does an eighteen year old pack for a bus trip to Dallas? A: "A backpack, a cell phone, iPod with earbuds, a fake mustache, super cool shades, a fairy princess toothbrush, brass knuckles, pepper spray, cigarettes, some cash and I.D., deodorant, "Kaddish" by Allen Ginsberg, Rumi's book, "The Glance" a book by H.R. Giger, and a clean change of clothes." (This alone tells me she's growing up. When she was nine we went to Mexico. After packing her bag for the trip, when we got to our first stop in Mexico I found that she had removed all her clean clothes I packed and replaced them with her favorite toys while I was out of the room. I never thought to check it before we left!)
Mom's last tip for the next Greyhound trip: Don't forget the Billy Bob teeth we got in San Antonio on our trip to Mexico, you never know when that might help you out of a jam.
its not an easy thing to say goodbye the way we did today though I haven't known you for as long as others here could say but how could I forget your smile your laughter and warm embrace? how could I close my eyes without a memory of your kind words and face? and still you met me at the door with open arms today though silently as tears flowed as I felt the sun extend his rays while your family and friends all gathered around to speak their words of love for you you were only 13 Jake just last month today was the last day on earth you knew and I too will miss you Jake, and I will remember you
The experience of Cooper's birthday party will help me when my birthday comes around, which is Nov. 2nd-All Souls Day, but we always celebrate it on Halloween. I think the plans might be to deconstruct a crime scene, i.e. me in a body bag, showing up in the trunk of the car at the club that friends will jump out and rope off near the entrance with yellow tape, "CRIME SCENE - DO NOT ENTER" - one of them will grab the gurney waiting inside to carry my body bag into the club, followed by letting me out of the bag for a staged shoot-out with water blasters filled with colored water that stains and then disappears, along with cap guns, and throwing lots of candy from my body bag once we hit the dance floor and take over the club, permission granted by Kat and the management just before the drag show begins at midnight, along with the best music and dancers. I got thrown out of this club on my last birthday for not having my ID, which I dropped somewhere along the way. William not being there to prevent it can help now by not letting them forget it! If the same bartender throws me out again, at least this time - I did it my way!
Here is the theme song playing at the club by my brother-in-law "DJ Peace" that will start the party:
Yesterday was my friend Cooper's 22nd Birthday - a time in life sometimes sparked by hedonism. Things can get complicated when planning a party with/for friends, sometimes things get a little carried away - people can even get carried away - literally!!!
It started with a text at 7am. William decided to throw a party for Cooper and needed some help: (A) I had to cancel my plans with Cooper for dinner and make him think I couldn't make it, and also that none of his friends could be there (ouch, no dinner with Cooper at Chili's?) (B) I had to get Cooper out of the house for the evening, while William (who was supposed to be working late) got things ready for the party, (C) I had to be at William's at 5pm to help him get things ready for the party, and (D) yes, there was (D), we had to go on a run to pick up people for the party and then get a few necessary things, a cake or two, drinks, balloons, and handcuffs?!
William, who would not take no for an answer, even if he had to get a little carried away, determined to get Cooper's friend Corey out of his house and get him to the party. As soon as Cory opened the door, William picked him up to carry him outside before he knew what's up. After some encouragement he agreed to go with us, and we picked up a few more people on the way who needed a ride (and a little encouragement) to get to the party, along with my daughter, Ariele. Other friends also showed up. Luckily, Cooper's friend and band mate, Ben, called just in time to get Cooper out of the house and they went to meet his mom for dinner at Chili's while we came back to get things ready.
By the time Cooper showed up again with Ben everything was ready. William met Cooper outside and talked with him privately, then managed to get him handcuffed to the lamppost in the front yard without the feared bloodshed. I think his words went something like this: "I don't have time to explain, but I've been through hell today, so if you resist me it's only going to piss me off, so it would be best if you just cooperate with me and let me handcuff you to this lamppost." Whatever he said, it worked like a charm and Cooper, who still had no idea what was going on just said, "what the hell?... um, ok dude" *lesson: never piss off a tired drag queen/'big brother'* The rest of us came outside on cue from William and lined up with water balloons - one for each of the 22 years - along with a few extras. William insisted that I had to go first, so after getting Cooper's okay I picked up the smallest one. I didn't throw it hard enough, so it bounced off his chest and broke when it fell onto the grass, "sploosh," significantly like when a mom's water breaks when a baby is about to be born. After that, Cooper was treated 'execution style' by a water balloon from each of his friends, until the 16th year turn came up, which was my turn again. Cooper told me he was only 16 when we first met, but he was actually 18. He and Ariele told me that story so I would let him in the house, ha. William helped me throw the balloon by grabbing my hand to direct my throw, so it broke over Cooper's shoulder. When the 22nd year came up, it was William's turn - which, instead of a balloon, he used a small, round pink cake that he threw at Cooper and got a little carried away at the end with rubbing it in. Afterward he uncuffed him and presented him with a large birthday cake with his name on it that we could all eat.
The idea was to be a symbolic way of shedding 22 years of bullshit and getting a new start. I was "kinda lame" about the idea at first, as Ariele put it, because I didn't understand the significance of being handcuffed and getting things thrown at you by friends you trust - until we did it. I kept saying I didn't want to do anything that could make someone feel torn down or hurt in any way, I knew Cooper had been through hell already. William said, "What?! did you think I was a NICE person?! Did you think this was going to be a NICE birthday party?!" And he had to explain things to me so I understood the significance. It was acting out, basically. I had to re-learn, due to my own past 'bad' experiences that it's okay to get wild, play and have fun. Not that I don't have a wild side and have fun, but I realized I had been robbed of a lot of fun in life by fear, trying to stay "safe" from my past abuse by not taking any "risk" where I was not "in control" even when it was a matter of trust and fun, so it was a symbolic and freeing experience for me as well. Cooper agreed to go along with it and was totally blown away by the whole thing because it was so unexpected. Cooper didn't expect that anyone was going to do anything special or show up on his birthday. His mom didn't show up for their dinner, which wasn't supposed to happen, but she did make it by the party, and other than that, Cooper had a killer birthday.
My recent experiment on the cut-up method used by William Burroughs has been an interestingly creative learning experience. It's like dissecting a frog in biology, except the frog is alive in this case, the frog being a chosen text, what Burroughs refers to as a pre-recorded coded slice of the universe, to reveal its inner beating heart, the implicit true meaning within the text. It's not too far off from the artists (Nitsch, Pollock, etc.), and those who smeared dead carcasses onto their canvases in an effort not to mirror life, but to act it out, even with their own bodies, using painting as a performance. Here is a link to my project:
The cut-up method was also used by many music artists in their recordings and lyrics, such as David Bowie's lyrics (The Laughing Gnostic: David Bowie and the Occult) and Kurt Cobain's lyrics, guitar feedback and distortion.
"the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time." Jack Kerouac
am I mad... or just 'beat'? a "beat-ific" vision of exalted exhaustion.
notes: experiencing the "anxiety of influence" Harold Bloom writes about, struggling to free himself from his affinity for the work of a writer he'd admired, is a sign of finding your own literary voice.
Karouac: "I don't care what anybody says, but I'm pulled out of my shoes by wild stuff like that ("crazy jazz") -- pure whiskey! Let's hear no more about jazz critics and those who wonder about bop: -- I like my whiskey wild, I like Saturday night in the shack to be crazy, I like the tenor to be woman-mad, I like things to GO and rock and be flipped, I want to be stoned if I'm going to be stoned at all, I like to be gassed by a back-alley music..."
i want to be pulled out of my shoes by wild stuff like that... I like things to GO and rock and be flipped...
"write only what kicks you, and keeps you overtime awake from sheer mad joy."
When friends fall out it can be brutal, especially when you have been like a family for so long. After a year and a half of keeping the two poles from collapsing in on each other, peace is finally here. Well, peace and anarchy! (My work here is done.)
Right about now, I could use a hot tub and a corona... better bring your shades, its going to be a bright summer!
To relieve stress and participate in an activity for an adolescent psychology class presentation today, we were asked to identify the shapes below and write down an object we imagined that matches the shapes:
These were my answers after just taking a really long math test with not much time for sleep (or meals) this week:
Circle = Table
Square = Table
Rectangle = Table
Pyramid = Freaky hotel in Vegas
(I hope I did better on my math test!)
P.S. My Poe book of poems, short stories, and essays went on a walk-about a couple of weeks ago. I was pretty sure I left it in the classroom after my presentation, but it wasn't turned it. I kept thinking it would show up, but I never could find it. Today I thought I'd stop in the bookstore across from the campus just in case it showed up there. Sure enough, it was behind the counter! It seemed so much like Poe to go missing and find him on an adventure. The bookstore across the street from the school used to be a tavern and still has a dark interior and the same counter. The manager knows me because I buy textbooks there often (and occasionally have to part with them). He sold it back to me for what he paid someone for my book, $5.00. It had all my handwritten notes inside, so it was easy to identify. My book now has a "Used" sticker on it, even though I first bought it new; it's another mark of ownership in the life of my book. As soon as I left the store and waited at the stop light, the local church bells, which are nearby but are very loud, began to ring, it was 2pm. How precise. And our last reading assignment for the Poe class this semester was "The Bells." I guess Emerson was right, he is "that jingles guy." The book arrived just in time to begin my class on The Beat Movement.
This Hubble photograph of an hourglass nebula has a strange looking center...
...compared to this picture of my eye, which looks similar to me (except this is not Hubble, it's my cell phone camera, which is not as clear even so close up and my eyes are hazel green):
I also read a description while doing some research recently which reminded me of the picture of the hourglass nebula:
In Chapter XVII of the Ancient Egyptian Book of the Dead, the opening passage reads: "I am Tem in rising. I am the only One. I came into being in Nu ("Nu, of the dark waters." Nu was the incomprehensible source of all things -- Chaos or Space.). I am Ra who rose in the beginning... The pillars of Shu were not as yet created (the division of heaven and earth). It is Ra, the creator of the names of his limbs, which came into being in the form of the gods, who are in the train of Ra" (i.e., the gods who personify his phases) -- fourteen Spirits, seven dark and seven light..."I am the Bennu bird (the Phoenix, type of resurrection) which is in Anu, and I am the keeper of the volume of the book of things which are and of things which shall be." In the eternity of his being occur vast cycles of activity followed by equal periods of rest: "Millions of years" is the name of the one, "Great Green Lake" is the name of the other, the "Lake" representing the cycle in which are swallowed up all things produced by "The Begetter of millions of years." In Chapter XLII he "who dwelleth in his eye" is beaming in "the solar egg, the egg to which is given life among the gods." In Chapter XV he is "Yesterday," "Today," and "Tomorrow," the one "who reposeth upon law which changeth not nor can it be altered." In Chapter LXXV he is the self-created god: "I gave birth unto myself together with Nu in my name of Khepera, in whom I come into being day by day. I am the creator of the darkness who maketh his habitation in the uttermost parts of the sky ... and I arrive at the confines thereof. I sail over the sky which formeth the division betwixt heaven and earth... None sees my nest, none can break my egg."
(Is it customary for all the gods to "speaketh" thus, or is it just the translators?)
The Book of the Dead, or as I prefer, the book of "Coming Forth by Day," was written long before Hubble, since now we can at least see the uttermost parts of the sky, and breaking the egg sounds similar to cracking a code to me. I like the idea that, as we are peering into space, someone would be looking back, "Would you like your space eggs solar fried this morning, or heat wave scrambled at 3 degrees above zero?"
I also heard an interesting description on PBS regarding astronomical measurements of the universe in waves which are expanding, the red shift theory, and blue shift, and the discovery of "3 degrees above zero," which was calculated in a laboratory in Princeton at about the same time the actual waves were being discovered by scientists working on radio and microwave measurements to pick up data that was outside of the range of light, as heat waves in areas of space void of stars, and where they expected it to be void of substance, and was expected to be cold, even colder than the space inhabited by stars. What they discovered was a presence of heat, 3 degrees above zero, which is described as being evidence of the afterglow of the big bang, a kind of cosmic "euphoria," and if that was as many billions of years ago as they have calculated, that was quite a bang to have such a long lasting afterglow(!). Oooo, he is a god!
The red shift is a measurement similar to the doppler effect of sound, like when a siren on an emergency vehicle passes by, blue being relative to the higher pitched sound as an object farther away moves toward you, and red being the lower pitched sound as the object passes and moves away from you, even though the speed itself has not changed if you are riding within the moving vehicle, the sound waves shorten with the approaching sound (blueshift waves) and then lengthen as it moves farther away (redshift waves), since frequency and wave length are related. Astronomical physicists and scientists are using this technique to study deep space and to measure what cannot be seen as light. If you see a duck swimming in the water, the wave frequencies in front of the duck are pushed closer together, and the waves behind are stretched out and longer, which, consequently creates an egg-shaped oval of frequency in the waves.
Does all this make your head spin? Its not spinning, its really only a reflection, or you could call it a phase of "lunar libration."
Friday night, I went to an art show near the OU campus in Norman, Oklahoma which was being held by some local artists and musicians. One of my friends who owns a used book store, "Book Beat & Co." was one of the artists with artwork on display and also playing music for the venue. He's known musically as "Bloody Ol' Mule," Shilo Brown from Oklahoma, a "Hell-bent honky tonk stomp hillbilly blues one man band kickin' your teeth in since 1976." He mixes banjo, guitar and drum, and other sounds all on his own, and who apologizes to me for his use of bad language if I'm around, although I tell him I'm not an innocent bystander and its not necessary!
While I was there, I started talking to one of the women standing by, who turned out to be "Rebelline," who, in addition to having some of her artwork on display, is one of the OKC Victory Dolls, a roller derby team in Oklahoma City. It turned out that many of the girls at the event Friday night were on the roller derby team. I ended up meeting some of them while hanging out for the evening, which included as much as you want to drink and ended with Rebelline inviting me to join their roller derby team. They seemed tolerant enough of my not drinking, which at the most usually involves me carrying around the same half-empty drink all evening, sooo, it could work...right? The next game is on May 15th, so I guess that leaves plenty of time to practice?
I wonder if it would be possible to wear a latex suit that is too slippery for anyone to catch me and bump me off!
Latex option
Speaking of latex, Rebelline is also friends with a local side show artist named "Boobzilla," from The Carnival of Cleavage, a female side show that is a combination of body modification and "Jim Rose Circus" type of stunts. They are planning to do an event together with the OKC Victory Dolls in the next few weeks. I recently met Jim Rose, which opened up an opportunity to perform in a sideshow, but his show is not local. The Carnival of Cleavage, on the other hand, is local.
Either way, if I were to consider it, I would need to come up with a stage name, a costume and an act - preferably something sci-fi, or an approach that isn't being done, since most of these ladies are three times my size. Jim Rose's wife, puts a large scorpion in her mouth. I would need something to give me an edge, but something more my style... Ziggy Stardust meets Rob Zombie comes to mind, as well as an aerial show, climbing ropes or silk sheets, doing stunts and falling in mid air to be caught at the last moment as: "the woman who fell to earth." What more can you do for fun, living in Oklahoma?
Cooper (who Todd also refers to as "pookey") with Todd Smith of former Dog Fashion Disco, Polkadot Cadaver, Knives Out and El-Creepo!
Cooper with Keys of Polkadot Cadaver in OKC 3-18-2010
This week's performance by Polkadot Cadaver at The Conservatory in OKC made me remember some of my other favorite rock&roll moments; whether "15 minutes of fame," or a life long journey of supporting local musicians.
Talking about music for me is like some people talking about their grandkids. I hope you'll tell me about your enjoyable music memories, or at least enjoy remembering them too!
One "music memory," in 1977, Fleetwood Mac came into National Car Rental in downtown OKC where I was working. I helped to rent them transportation to make it to their venue in Tulsa, OK. They invited me to join them at their venue and said if I could make it, they'd have two back stage passes for me and a guest at the door. I was 20 years old, and I took my sister, who was sixteen. We shocked the people at the ticket window when we arrived when I told them my backstage pass was waiting, and they said, "yeah, right;" but they found them and said, "Oh, yeah, You're right, they're here!" We were escorted to the backstage and watched the whole concert from backstage as Stevie Nix was singing onstage. Everyone went out to Denny's afterward with the band and stayed out till the sun came up! I made it back to OKC just in time for work the next morning, minus any sleep!
The most recent experience before this week's concert was in October 2009 with RevCo, meeting Sin Quirin, the guitarist for Ministry and RevCo (or The Revolting Cocks) and Josh, the frontman for RevCo, as well as Jim Rose of the Jim Rose Circus. They were in OKC together recently. Jim nicknamed me "Shy Girl" and says I am "a rock star." We saw Ministry's last tour in Tulsa on March 16, 2008 along with Burton C. Bell of Fear Factory as a surprise guest, also bands Meshuggah,, from Stockholm, and Hemlock, from Las Vegas which we also got to meet!
One of my most favorite musicians has been Ogre Nivek of Skinny Puppy, also in the project Rx, and his OhGr project, but appears with Ministry, KMFDM, &; Pigface. We went to Dallas, TX to see Skinny Puppy's MythMaker Tour in June 2007. We were at the front rail during the concert, with only a walk space between us and the stage, so I was able to get pictures with my cell phone occasionally. I had to leave the rail temporarily for the first performance, when Otto von Schirack came on stage. The sound was at the highest legal limit, of course, but the rapid drum machine made the floor and everything vibrate so much I literally couldn't breathe! I had to step to the side until White Mice came on, just as loud, but different sound effects. I managed to get my place back and then after White Mice, da- dah-dah- dahhhh!: Skinny Puppy!!! Ogre looked straight into my eyes as he sang, repeating from the Process Album, Hardset Head, "...No excuses, excuses, excuses, excuses,(x7)" which is now riveted into my mind. Ogre is very gracious, generous toward fans, and we had the opportunity to meet him backstage after the concert; but I decided not to wait. I had to drive back to OKC from Dallas afterward during a heavy thunderstorm.
Ongoing support/promotion for local musicians include my daughter Ariele's dad, Josh, front man of Hopeless Destroyers in Kansas City, MO; his brother, Justin's band, Dark Ages, and Justin's wife, Robin's band, Street Legal, all in KC, MO; Gary Shilling, front man of Pulpit Red of OKC; Cooper Judd front man of projects including Warped Corpses in OKC; SubSanity, a thrash band originally from Pauls Valley, OK, esp. original members through 1994; and a former band, Hate Party of OKC, reminiscent of Flipper! Check them out on sites like myspace, youtube, reverb nation and others!
photos:
Ministry's "C-U-La-Tour" March 2008, not the best view, but the mosh pit was sooo crazy you couldn't get closer, when we tried, they passed Ariele's friend around till he ended up right in the same spot again!
Ogre of Skinny Puppy, MythMaker Tour, 6/07-from my cell phone
Ariele with her dad, Josh Betterton of Hopeless Destroyers, KC, MO (during a mustache-growing contest with his brother Justin!)
This weekend my sister and I were talking about recent dental work. Then she mentioned that when an elephant's teeth go bad, the only thing they can eat is very ripe or spoiled fruit, which makes them become drunk from the fermentation. When this happens, the elephant can become very dangerous and can wreck whole villages!
The example of the elephant reminded me of thoughts being like fruit and the elephant being like our tongue. When thoughts become negative, if we allow them to ripen or ferment, our tongue can become like the elephant who is eating rotten fruit, with the power to wreck whole villages! I guess it could be considered a type of mental hygiene, compared to dental hygiene.
This week has been a week of gratitude for me. I am grateful for the experience to work with the people I have been in class with, or academically and personally. I am stricken over the loss of one of my classmates this week, but I am grateful for, and will remember his gifts and abilities which made a lasting impression on me. I hope to learn how to express my gratitude to others in meaningful ways, while they are near, and not take the opportunities I have for granted to make each day count.
The advanced composition class has been great experience for me to think about electronic media and how it shapes our lives. I have gained more experience with using it, and look forward to learning more about it. The semester always goes too quickly! Maybe its my schedule this semester, but the weeks are flying by so fast. I hope to take the Beat Poet course during the Intersession, if it is being offered.
I have no idea what to do with my extra time (jk)... but, I will miss this class! Take care Dr. Hochenauer! Your class challenged me and caused me to think about many things I need to learn. I hope to stay in touch!
Me...reading, and caught looking at my favorite website (had to block it to protect the innocent) some songs that amazed me this week: loverman (cover): Martin L. Gore
Here is me getting my root canal! Three hours of holding my mouth open made me think of all the times I should have kept it closed! Payback's a .... painful process.
This week has been a challenge to stay sane (a relative term), with little sleep and a full schedule, appointments and assignments due. I made it through, but not in the greatest form. By Saturday, it seems I had regressed to the point I could barely hold a cup when at work I dropped a customer's large supreme deep dish pizza on the floor, then a can of soda (at least a whole meal was sacrificed). The list goes on, then when I got home, the pizza delivery car topper was still on my car, so I had to drive back and turn it in.
Earlier in the week, I made it most of one day until, arriving at an appointment at 4pm, I realized my sweater was on backwards, which was a turtleneck, so who would know, right? I had been watching a youtube video by Tom Greene earlier in the week, "The Backwards Man," so I had to laugh and I started singing it until a woman walked out of the building. I stopped, but she looked at me like I was having too much fun to be walking alone in the parking lot! So, today, I am hoping the next week will go a little smoother. Tests and papers are due, so we'll see. But at least, no root canal!
Above is a photo of my visit to the College of Dentistry at OU. I have two student dentists who take turns working on my dental care. They are best friends, and have been really great to me. Aaron, with the mask, first helped me. I had a bad experience a few years back with one dental procedure, so when I first went to the school, I was very nervous (an anxiety attack is more accurate). However, he was very thoughtful and patient. Rob is the friend he recommended to do some of the work, and he came to check and see if Aaron was doing things right, ha. They have been very understanding and have done a wonderful job. I highly recommend their program to anyone. They helped me get into the full program, which is not easy, since openings for new patients are limited.
We each have more than one story that makes up who we are. Growing up in a broken home, where my mother was a German immigrant, my parents divorced and she remarried an abusive and violent alcoholic, domestic violence became common and familiar to me and part of my story. Somehow, I felt a degree of protective immunity in adolescence, that I was somehow invincible, and that it would never happen to me. This idea got me through, until it did happened to me. You'd think that after growing up in the midst of domestic violence, I would have recognized the signs. But, unfortunately, I didn't, until they became obvious and it was too late to avoid. I was twenty before I learned why that is common, but I blamed myself for allowing it until I began to learn more about it, once I was free from the situation.
One of the benefits of my experiences growing up is that it gave me a desire to help others who were victims of abuse, neglect and violence. During my break with the past, I toured with Ringling Brothers and Barnum & Bailey Circus for one season in 1977. The circumstances which led to my "running away with the circus" were profoundly well timed and orchestrated for this opportunity that fell into my lap. It not only became my way of escape, but a turning point for me where I learned to take a stand and fight to be free.
When I returned to Oklahoma after one season on tour due to family circumstances, I began to work for a non-profit organization that was founded by a couple who had just returned to Oklahoma City from Kampuchea. They were the last Americans to leave Phnom Penh when it fell to the Khmer Rouge. In 1979 until 1984, I worked for them as a personal secretary and assistant. I was responsible for correspondence with the continual flow of mail from the refugee camps, each seeking to find sponsors to relocate in the United States. Some knew the founders personally, Todd and DeAnn Burke, from their time in Phnom Penh, and others had heard of them and their organization. They had spent a few years in Kampuchea and written a book about their experiences there, titled "Anointed for Burial." We also had a large constituency that contributed to their work in the Thai border camps, as well as for those who were associated with their work in Katmandu, Nepal, Calcutta, India and the Philippines.
The Burkes also had two sons, Judson, who was 3 years old and Jeremi, who was 6 months old when we first met. They later had more children, five in all. Their work grew to include many organizations associated with their work in Europe, Canada and Australia. People were coming to their home from all over the world on a continual basis, leaders of organizations and people who wanted to meet them after reading their book and influenced by their work. Todd also traveled extensively from time to time internationally. My job also included living with the family for the first two years, although I had my own separate space, a room built onto the house, like one of the anchorite nuns! But we were basically housemates. I also assisted with the children and many aspects of their daily lives.
Todd was a mentor for me not only for my work experience, but also in seizing the day, and making the most of opportunities in life, sometimes wrestling them from the jaws of the lion, sometimes creating them from thin air, and sometimes by rebuilding on the broken ruins (or 'tels').
I enjoyed my work, especially when I got to be directly involved with the correspondence and relocation of the Khmer people. I was invited to attend two banquets to meet and shake the hand of the President of Free Cambodia (Kampuchea) at the time, President Lon Nol. I also had up to nine Khmer roommates at a time, when they would come to Oklahoma City to relocate. This usually included picking people up from the airport after their flight directly from the Thai border camps, and assisting them with every aspect of their new life in the States; including practical things, such as applying with the Social Security Office for their new Social Security cards, (and yes, they noticed when I got lost driving downtown!), obtaining local state id's, enrolling in ESL classes, looking for jobs, and providing transportation to all the necessary activities. I learned how to shop at the Asian market, for example! I also learned from my roommates how to eat with chop sticks, Asian cooking, some Khmer language and many of their home remedies. We enjoyed many activities together as they adjusted to their new lives in the States.
One of the first families that relocated to Oklahoma City opened their own restaurant, which has been successful now for many years. They had no money when they first arrived, but achieved their goals by working long hours and saving. Some of the families or individuals have married and moved to other cities to reunite with family and friends. (I have included a few photos.)
This last photo is a picture of my mother and step-father. I am happy to say that their lives improved over time and my stepfather stopped drinking. Although things weren't perfect, they were happy together and had one daughter together, my sister Paula.
Its always nice to remember them, their life struggles, their stories, and, as Tom Petty sang, the fact that we don't have to live life like refugees!
